After almost 19 months in foster care with us, CD is celebrating her third birthday tomorrow. A part of me can't believe that as she turns three she is still my "foster" daughter. A year ago I didn't know that I didn't really know what to expect in this whole process. Now I don't think that the adoption will be final by the time she turns four. As frustrating as that is, I feel so fortunate that she is spending her third birthday with us and glad that we are in a place to feel confident that eventually, she will spend her birthdays with us as our forever daughter.
CD managed to get through the terrible twos without any meltdowns at all. Sure she asserts herself, says "I don't like you," will at first refuse to do what she doesn't want to do but I am impressed with her ability to tolerate her own distress, regroup rather quickly and accept when no means no. She has always been like that though. Resilient and tough. She doesn't fall apart, at least not yet. The threes, I have found, can be the "terrible" time. Though this kid is so cute that it is hard to imagine getting all that frustrated with her. She is just so affectionate and funny!
On her birthday, unfortunately, she will be going for her first visit to an allergist. She has been throwing up almost daily and is not sick. Poor kid absolutely hates throwing up. She doesn't even like being a little dirty, vomiting makes her miserable. We believe that it is milk related but really it could be anything. At times like these it would be nice to have some information about her biological family but we'll have to work around it.
Otherwise, nothing has changed. There will be a bunch of hearing and filings and whatnot for the next six months. If after six months nothing changes there will be a trial set for the Termination of Parental Rights. I have given up being annoyed at how ridiculously long the process is. There is nothing I can do to change it. As long as CD is with us she doesn't know that her legal status is on hold. She knows she has a family and a huge extended group of family and friends who adore her and can't wait to sing "Happy Birthday" as she turns the big 3.
6 comments:
Happy birthday!
I suspected a former kid was lactose intolerant instead of having an allergy to dairy per se. Unfortunately there's not a test for LI. We just started cutting down the dairy and it seemed to help. I hope you are able to get some answers and she feels better quickly.
Are you having a party theme for her?
happy birthday!
Happy birthday, CD!
Throwing up is the absolute worst. I hope you figure out what's wrong and she feels better.
Wow, it seems like so recently you were celebrating her second birthday! It feels so wrong to me to have the process extend so long that having come to you at under a year, she could be four before it's finalized.
In the meantime, a belated Happy Birthday to a very special little girl!
Kathy
My mom always claimed my sister and I had the most trouble at four, much more than at two. That might just be a reflection of her personality though - she says we both started whining at that age, and I'm pretty sure she's prefer tantrums to whining!
You reminded me of her with your "no means no" line. I got that a lot as a kid, along with "a little less cute, a little more common sense!" Good advice for adults too... :D
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